brad. so how is your day going pumpkin?

kris. well

i thought it was going alright until my guy friend called me pumpkin, then i realized i have a whole list of pending issues
is that because you enjoyed it?'

brad. come on you know part of you enjoyed being called pumpkin

kris. now all you need is women parts

ok, this is a strange one indeed! i hope my parents never stumble across the atrocious nonsense. -kg

carfbfar: i wihs that guy didnt live at LP....because i would really like to avoid him sat night
oknotok911: oooh that
carfbfar: how long is the closing?
oknotok911: he will totally be there
oknotok911: does he live there
carfbfar: thats
carfbfar: bad
oknotok911: thank yo ufor nothing
AIM: carfbfar has changed status to Idle
AIM: carfbfar has changed status to Available
carfbfar: anytime
oknotok911: legal
carfbfar: is she?
oknotok911: legal enough, but far too young
carfbfar: how is far too young?
oknotok911: i cantdate someone in college i dont think. too unstable, because when they get out, the mind will change
carfbfar: haha
carfbfar: your only 2 years outta college yourself
carfbfar: its not too young
oknotok911: too young
oknotok911: !!!!!!!!!!!
carfbfar: im sure after 38, 21 is much much to young
carfbfar: just babies at 21
carfbfar: you really should have tried the cooling mint condom
carfbfar: that would def make things not boring and only chilling
oknotok911: um. who the fuck sucks a condom?
carfbfar: when did i ever say anything about sucking on a condom?
oknotok911: whats the deal with the mint then?
carfbfar: well
carfbfar: i dunno
carfbfar: it would cool things i suppose
carfbfar: it would be menthol for your dick
oknotok911: oh my
oknotok911: xxx

ok, this is a strange one indeed! i hope my parents never stumble across the atrocious nonsense. -kg

carfbfar: i wihs that guy didnt live at LP....because i would really like to avoid him sat night
oknotok911: oooh that
carfbfar: how long is the closing?
oknotok911: he will totally be there
oknotok911: does he live there
carfbfar: thats
carfbfar: bad
oknotok911: thank yo ufor nothing
AIM: carfbfar has changed status to Idle
AIM: carfbfar has changed status to Available
carfbfar: anytime
oknotok911: legal
carfbfar: is she?
oknotok911: legal enough, but far too young
carfbfar: how is far too young?
oknotok911: i cantdate someone in college i dont think. too unstable, because when they get out, the mind will change
carfbfar: haha
carfbfar: your only 2 years outta college yourself
carfbfar: its not too young
oknotok911: too young
oknotok911: !!!!!!!!!!!
carfbfar: im sure after 38, 21 is much much to young
carfbfar: just babies at 21
carfbfar: you really should have tried the cooling mint condom
carfbfar: that would def make things not boring and only chilling
oknotok911: um. who the fuck sucks a condom?
carfbfar: when did i ever say anything about sucking on a condom?
oknotok911: whats the deal with the mint then?
carfbfar: well
carfbfar: i dunno
carfbfar: it would cool things i suppose
carfbfar: it would be menthol for your dick
oknotok911: oh my
oknotok911: xxx

carfbfar: haha
dude, funniest thing i overheard this morning
girl on cell phone: "yeah mom, it was a HUGE black man...uh huh...yeah i know
...! who washes the floor with a sponge anyway?!"

LADIES AND GENTS, this last message took 30 minutes to complete, theres only like 15 lines.. how sad!

[11:07] carfbfar: i believe in dinosasurs
[11:07] carfbfar: i believe in them more than i do in god and jesus
[11:07] OkNotOk911: .... well, that makes sense actually
[11:10] carfbfar: but i worship at the knees of bread and sushi men
[11:12] carfbfar: if we could kidnap and man who could live in our apt and make us sushi all day long, i might never ever leave
[11:24] OkNotOk911: you would have to make enough money so that he could stay and you could sublet your salary to him
[11:28] carfbfar: im not paying him
[11:28] carfbfar: hes kidnapped
[11:28] carfbfar: hell do it for the love of it
[11:29] carfbfar: and because if he doesnt ill let my cat use his face as a scratching post
[11:29] carfbfar: maybe hell even do it for the taste
[11:46] OkNotOk911: lol wow
[11:46] OkNotOk911: another blog worthy comment by carin
[11:47] carfbfar: haha
[11:47] carfbfar: yay
[11:47] carfbfar: my new goal is to get into your blog more often

TODAY IS Thursday, Carfbfar is Carin, my new roomie just so you know!

carfbfar: i remember tons of public pool times when some punk would take a dump in the pool somewhere and then they would have to close the whole thing down for like, 2 hours to clean it
carfbfar: it was awful
OkNotOk911: lmao
OkNotOk911: eww
carfbfar: i would have like, just gotten there and would have to suffer thru the 10 mins it took to apply sun screen tot my pale as the moon skin, and then id be all ready to go plunge in and theyd be like sorry sport, pool closed
OkNotOk911: awesome fucking awesome


carfbfar: i worked at a summer camp where they found a tape worm in the pool
carfbfar: once
OkNotOk911: wow
carfbfar: i had to tell 20 5-6 year olds they couldnt go swimming, and then i had 20 screaming and crying 6 year olds
carfbfar: which is awful
carfbfar: kids under 10 are nightmares
truth
carfbfar: these kids always wanted to be naked
carfbfar: and they peed the bed too much

[11:52] OkNotOk911: and tell him he has to buy that spray to put on each one, and that we may need to reprint them better with better scans

[11:58] carfbfar: he said he wants a cup of sour cream and one sliver of a grinded lemon

[11:58] OkNotOk911: tell him i will give him 4 dolalrs and he can go get all of that stuff, i dont know what type of lemons he enjoys

[11:59] carfbfar: green lemons
[11:59] carfbfar: that are not limes

[12:00] OkNotOk911: florida, california, or the middle east?
[12:00] carfbfar: russia

[12:02] OkNotOk911: from a scandinavian princess with short skirt and long legs, covered in fishnets, colored of the national flag, .. hands me a beautiful green lemon, that of which i have never seen before, which of which i will never witness again.. forever...

[12:03] carfbfar: she will be war torn swede, emigrated to that country from the age of 5 and 3 quarters.....she will meet you in the village square at 11.43 and 2 seconds. if your late, she will be forced to eat that lemon for she can only eat spinach every other tuesday on a full moon.

[12:04] carfbfar: her lively hood is selling those rare and secretive lemons
[12:04] carfbfar: and if they dont leave her hands at exactly that moment, they will spoil and stain her hands red
[12:05] carfbfar: for she carries a deep sin that even her physical presence is not acutely aware of

[12:06] OkNotOk911: but that green and red mixture, will produce something that a color wheel has never seen before. .. . .. the blood, the sweat, the tears, of an entire earth who knew mothing of her before this day.. this moment... will now know her name..... BLOOD RED is what they called here.. some called her BLOOD ORANGE but the green wasnt effective enough, not eve na little bit....

[12:12] carfbfar: she wanders aminlessly thru the square after someone has failed to come, the blood green orange red on her hands and the stain from the devoured orange on his lips, glistening in the spring sun. past carts of dull brown cloth and baskets of wicker woven shoes. she searches for a child with brown and white hair, approx. 849 cm tall, with gray green eyes.

[12:16] carfbfar: she secretly sticks straw down the back of his shirt. and is taken back to a time when she could taste the cripsy scales of a fish in her seaside home.

[12:19] OkNotOk911: the seaside was frozen in this new day. she realized that she would never see it again........... this mad world has only seen the beginning of Blood Red. . . the new world order was in out immediate future. she was the immortal, she was the thing we dreamed of, what movies were about, the perfect, the fishnets.....

[12:25] OkNotOk911: whew....

APRIL 25, APRIL 26 - 2006

[12:55] Nero's Indulgence As Mine...: ooo i've got a long list of music for you to download!
[12:56] Nero's Indulgence As Mine...: you're going to have so much fun!
[12:56] He was a real boy!!!!: lol.... i need to find you a program
[12:56] Nero's Indulgence As Mine...: yes you do!!!
[12:57] Nero's Indulgence As Mine...: but i already have one...
[12:57] Nero's Indulgence As Mine...: Gravebit
[12:58] He was a real boy!!!!: i heard that the RIAA closed that one
[12:58] Nero's Indulgence As Mine...: ha ha ha
[12:58] Nero's Indulgence As Mine...: how depressing
[13:00] He was a real boy!!!!: yea, they caught him dowmlaoding that song named Popcorn by the Popcorn Makers
[13:00] Nero's Indulgence As Mine...: caramel was my favorite of all the singles
[13:00] Nero's Indulgence As Mine...: sweet and caring song
[13:00] Nero's Indulgence As Mine...: down the throat
[13:00] He was a real boy!!!!: Popcorn is a real song thank you!
[13:01] Nero's Indulgence As Mine...: really? by who?
[13:01] Nero's Indulgence As Mine...: please don't tell me that Popcorn Makers is real

THE NEXT DAY (TODAY)

[10:25] Nero's Indulgence As Mine...: he was a real boy, and she was a real bitch
[10:25] He was a real boy!!!!: siempre
[10:25] Nero's Indulgence As Mine...: lol
[10:26] He was a real boy!!!!: (Link: http://www.popcorn-song.com/)http://www.popcorn-song.com/
[10:26] Nero's Indulgence As Mine...: what's with the spanish man?
[10:26] He was a real boy!!!!: look under 1972
[10:26] Nero's Indulgence As Mine...: 1972?
[10:26] He was a real boy!!!!: popcorn makers - popcorn, and you know the song
[10:27] He was a real boy!!!!: goto versions
[10:27] Nero's Indulgence As Mine...: wait, is it under "dwnloads"?
[10:27] Nero's Indulgence As Mine...: ahh - now you are making sense
[10:28] Nero's Indulgence As Mine...: ha ha ha - gayest song ever


Thank you ladies and gentlemen.

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (12:24:37 PM)
i want food

I aint ur fatha says: (12:25:01 PM)
like some cold milk from out the toilet

I aint ur fatha says: (12:25:12 PM)
two batteries, some brillo, and some foil, hell boil it

I aint ur fatha says: (12:25:21 PM)
hed be better off on pc nude

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (12:25:22 PM)
ha ha ha

I aint ur fatha says: (12:25:25 PM)
and its a feud

I aint ur fatha says: (12:25:29 PM)
so dont be in no tv mood

I aint ur fatha says: (12:25:38 PM)
Food

I aint ur fatha says: (12:25:42 PM)
WE NEEEED FOOOOD

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (12:25:45 PM)
ha ha ha - yeah, good one

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (12:28:16 PM)
so, we should go binge drinking this weekend... what say?

I aint ur fatha says: (12:28:40 PM)
um what

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (12:30:06 PM)
i'll take that as a yes! yo, what happened to Kaz that night?

I aint ur fatha says: (12:30:59 PM)
bingo?

I aint ur fatha says: (12:31:05 PM)
oh binge

I aint ur fatha says: (12:31:08 PM)
nah, fuck that

I aint ur fatha says: (12:31:12 PM)
this weekend is a chill down

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (12:31:13 PM)
ha ha ha

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (12:31:18 PM)
yeah

I aint ur fatha says: (12:31:19 PM)
no drinking for my black ass

I aint ur fatha says: (12:31:31 PM)
gabby got food poisining

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (12:32:06 PM)
ha ha ha ha - yeah man, my bro and myself just lay in beed ALL sat and sunday. we went out once for dinner, and then dragged our angloindian asses back and re-watched season 1 of Lost

I aint ur fatha says: (12:32:48 PM)
damn

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (12:32:54 PM)
what!??! wait, he doesn't get the 201 STD's that he should have, but instead gets food poisoning?! what the hell is going on man?!

I aint ur fatha says: (12:36:32 PM)
she did

I aint ur fatha says: (12:36:45 PM)
and hat are you talking about, i have some pictures for you

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (12:38:55 PM)
cool, send them via my hotmail address please

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (12:39:21 PM)
you said Gabby got poisoning, right? as in gabby who sleeps with 1600 freshmen women?!

I aint ur fatha says: (12:42:20 PM)
what gabby are you talking about, i am speaking ofkazs gf

I aint ur fatha says: (12:42:25 PM)
what the fuck are ou talking about

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (12:44:24 PM)
oh - i thought gabby from purchase... the mad who thought he could never get aids

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (12:44:37 PM)
but now I know what you are talking about, and i have nothing more to say!

I aint ur fatha says: (12:44:37 PM)
why would i mention him?

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (12:44:51 PM)
god know - you are always so random, so it wasn't much of a surprise for me

I aint ur fatha says: (12:45:57 PM)
um futtever

I aint ur fatha says: (12:46:27 PM)
no email is working rght now so i cannot send you the icture at the moment

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (12:47:10 PM)
all good - send it whenever

I aint ur fatha says: (12:47:51 PM)
yea im sending you a picture of a gay man shaving his balls

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (12:50:51 PM)
ha ha ha - you always know how to cheer me up on these depressing mondays

I aint ur fatha says: (12:51:07 PM)
if that doesnt do it. nothing can

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (12:51:19 PM)
nothing at all

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (12:51:26 PM)
not even you with an afro!

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (12:51:49 PM)
oh, brad and i would give anything to see you with a small afro - it would be DA BOMB!

I aint ur fatha says: (12:54:03 PM)
and its not going to happen so do it digital

I aint ur fatha says: (12:54:38 PM)
oh youre gettign these pics now

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (12:55:21 PM)
bring it biach!

I aint ur fatha says: (12:56:28 PM)
god, this fucking email

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (12:57:08 PM)
lol - don't think god wants anything to do with a gay sack-a-shaved man

I aint ur fatha says: (12:57:45 PM)
sent

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (12:58:06 PM)
cools

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (12:59:08 PM)
eli sent me some pics too - yo, what was your friend's name again?

I aint ur fatha says: (1:00:39 PM)
caleb

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (1:00:47 PM)
oh yeah - cool

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (1:05:58 PM)
wow - you might be the gayest man alive... even more gay than brad

I aint ur fatha says: (1:05:59 PM)
you like

I aint ur fatha says: (1:06:06 PM)
?

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (1:06:29 PM)
i honestly did not expect you to actually send me pics of a man shaving his balls

I aint ur fatha says: (1:07:51 PM)
oh man

I aint ur fatha says: (1:07:54 PM)
fucking classic

7/4 (Shoreline) says: (1:08:14 PM)
i sent it to brad already... i know he will appreciate it all the most

I aint ur fatha says: (1:09:13 PM)
lol


 The following message could not be delivered:
lol


I aint ur fatha says: (1:09:17 PM)
yes!!!!!


He goes by the name of Darth Vader, I call him Darth, got dammit! First Name Basis Bitches!!!!!

-YYYYEEEEAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!

so its the end of monday... apple called me today and wanted me to relocate to California to be a digital imaging software engineer, i told them to fuck off, twice!!!! that would be a whole new bunch of friends that I would end up hating with all of my heart, and I dont know if I have enough filth inside of me to take it. Ill stay on the east coast thank you....home of all of the shit weather and all these fuckingdave's...what a boring ass name anyhow....


who needs silicon valley when you can grab a pair on your man's anyday,... thats right brad..... all you dear!

-striving for perfect hair and unemployed status! -kg